I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
