I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Hippo gnu deer
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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