JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
