Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
