Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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