Buhtt sex?
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
