ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
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