The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
as a side note pls kill me
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize