stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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