What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
