You're so nebulous sometimes
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
