It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
Randomize
