He asked to "fluff my boner.."
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
