Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
