I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Randomize
