Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize