So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
This house was built for laser tag.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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