look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize