His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Randomize
