She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
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