You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize