It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
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