Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just had sex on a roof
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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