And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
