This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
