She's JV to your varsity
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize