tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
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