lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Randomize
