I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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