Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize