I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
