so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize