these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
