My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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