if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
a search helicopter?!
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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