He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
