we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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