Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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