do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Randomize