I'm gonna have a badass scar
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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