shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
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