I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Randomize
