You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
