I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
