Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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