What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Randomize
