How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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