Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
