YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Randomize
