I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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